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TOPIC: Comfort Within!

Comfort Within! 5 years 3 months ago #3634

  • Rocky
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I’m learning to pay attention. I mean listening to Karen really opened my eyes. I ask Emily how she feels more and I try to pay attention so she doesn’t have to tell me. I don’t want her to ever feel like I didn’t care how she feels, because I do.

I have had the hairs stand up on the back of my neck, when my father in law set his sons after me it scared me pretty bad. They were terrible and I look back at my life back then and I don’t know how I survived. Like many of us in this Forum family, Sir Paul saved my life. He picked me up, dusted me off, and set me straight. I saw a sight on the library computer, looked at it, and every day I hurried to the library so I could see what was going on. It was like breath for me. Sir Paul saw me and reached out. It shocked me. He made a grown man cry, something I tried to never do. I knew all to well what was expected of me as a man. I just didn’t know how to be the man I was expected to be. It was so hard. I drank a little but I couldn’t afford to have a habit. I was homeless, sleeping in my car, that was up for repo.

I want to be able to see things like Mason and her father saw things. Intend to practice fine tuning my sixth sense to better prepare for being what my family needs me to be.
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Comfort Within! 5 years 3 months ago #3637

  • Emily
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Karen’s story is an eyeopener. To many women stay in marriages where they are basically in a prison of sorts. The pain of what happened to Becca is so raw when she speaks as to know it’s not possible the judge didn’t realize he was hurting her. If he had listened to her when Becca was young she might be here today and so many lives would not have been so troubled or touched by tragedy. All Becca’s kids have suffered because the judge wouldn’t put any value in his wife’s opinion and get help for a clearly mentally struggling child. All of this makes this article that much more significant. We don’t live in this world alone and we have to care about how those close to us feel about things that affect them and that are going on around them. We have to.

I know how hard it was for my father trying to be the positive parent while married to my mother. I saw how it is when a woman totally disregards how her husband feels about things. I am glad my father is finally happy because he certainly deserves it. I have had an encounter with a boy who scared the piss out of me, literally. He was a bully and he enjoyed hurting people. He watched him break a boy’s arm and laugh about it. He threatened to do the same thing to me if I said anything. I said something anyway. He was expelled and finally arrested because he started threatening the boy’s family. I don’t know what ultimately became of him but the father felt he had to get a fire arm to protect his family.

Peace of mind is a precious thing and really not easy to come by when especially when you live with a selfish person, a hellish person, or both. I think it’s sad how one person can disrupt the lives of so many people. All of it makes me hug my husband a little tighter every day. I know what he’s been through and I want him to be at peace now.

I’m going to start practicing on my Six Sense tuning right away. :cheer:
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Comfort Within! 5 years 3 months ago #3638

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Kelton…I really feel bad about how your sister treated you and I do think it speaks to her character. I mean, we can’t blame everything on her husband, Jay’s dad. It’s not like he put a gun to her head and demanded she turn her back on her only brother. Jay you be careful because I agree with Luke, she’s angry with you for drudging all of this back up.

Karen, I’m glad you are free and I am so sorry you felt your hands were tied when it came to caring for your daughter. I think you were right and you should have been heard. I am really sad to hear how you felt rarely mattered. I know how that is though. Dad was like that with our mother. I intensely disliked our father, and like Carmine says he was the first scary person I encountered in life. He beat on our mother, he beat on us kids. We were silent about it most of the time because, as males, we were expected to suck it up and deal with it. That was the manly thing to do. This helps me greatly respect what Mason said about the male role in a family. It’s not easy because we grow up hearing we can’t cry, we can’t show to much emotion, but we are expected to automatically know how to love our families when we have been taught to show love is to be weak. It’s all the mixed messages and conflicting messages that make it hard and send us to the bar to have a few stiff ones. I don’t teach my sons they can’t cry. I don’t them not to hug and show affection. I don’t tell them their feelings don’t matter. I don’t want my wife to feel as if her feelings don’t matter.

Shawn…dude that is a scary situation. I’m glad you stood your ground but I’m getting tired of working around so many crazy people. I think it’s worse in the era of trump. I think it’s nice to pick up on the desires of people close to us without them providing verbal confirmation. I agree, we need to pay closer attention to the none verbal ways we communicate with each other. I know I’ll be fine-tuning my sixth sense going forward.
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Comfort Within! 5 years 3 months ago #3643

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Well, I think it’s true it’s hard to know how to be a man when you grow up in a trouble home. I really appreciate Mason’s words and I’m glad she put into words how hard it is to be in a role designed by men for other men. It would be nice if we lived our lives based on how the Most High expects us to live our lives not other men.

I am also disturbed that Karen was so unhappy. If you haven’t all guessed by now, I have a real soft spot for women being unhappy. I hate to see a woman cry and I hate knowing she fells helpless or in slaved by a man who is supposed to love her. She should have been heard for so many reasons and I am so sorry Karen, you weren’t shown your value in your marriage to Jim.

I have encountered several people who have made the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. One attacked an officer and almost choked him to death in front of three of us who fought to free our fellow officer. He was strong and hell bent on taking another life. I finally hit his ass over the head and didn’t care if I killed him. He survived and so did the officer. In law enforcement we encounter these kinds of people all the time.

I think it’s important to pay attention to none verbal communication because it usually more informative than spoken communication. You can pick up quite a bit from a person just watching their behavior.

I also agree that the use of secondary forms of seeking inner peace can become a problem when they are not used in moderation. I’ve seen this all to often. My father definitely had this problem. He had a troubled childhood if you ask me, just dealing with his side of the family. Them folks are crazy. I’m serious. I don’t fear much and I’ll tell you why. Uncle Mike, Uncle Nick, Tony, and Carmine. I don’t fear anyone or anything. I never feared my father and didn’t hesitate to tell him if he kept threatening mom I’d be calling on my uncles. He knew the deal and I’m glad he knew the deal. Many people knew the deal. I was glad I had that defense. I didn’t have to say a word, I’d just pick up a picture, look at it, and look at dad. None Verbal Communication, I love it. :lol: :lol: :lol: .

I’m also anxious to test out my sixth sense and see how good it works. :cheer:
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Comfort Within! 5 years 3 months ago #3644

  • Justine
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I think Mason is amazing. I loved what she said about the pressure that is on men via societal norms, the expectations placed on men can be clearly overwhelming. I’m reading how they grow up learning they can’t really show emotion because it’s a weakness. It’s wrong, they are human.

I know about the devastating effects of secondary forms of obtaining peace of mind. I’ve known my share of alcoholics in my life. Many of the are in grandpa and grandma’s circle. Have you ever noticed that wealthy people have drinking problems? They do. I guess that means they aren’t as happy as everyone thinks they are. I recall Mark telling us that some of us have a beer or two a day, a glass of wine with ever meal, a heavier drink later in the evening. This is excessive. I agree. It is problem when that much drinking is going on. I remember him telling us if we were doing this it was time to stop. I saw an change in many people the next meeting. It was amazing I mean I was looking for it but I’m not sure anyone else noticed it.

I like being encouraged to pay more attention to none verbal forms of communication because I have to agree, it is more telling. I also want to make sure I’m paying the right measure of attention to my husband and our children. I never want him to think I don’t love him. My heart goes out to Karen as well. I can totally see how hard it has been for her and how costly. We can’t do this kind of thing to each other. WE have to think about what we are doing and fix it if it’s causing another discomfort in anyway. That’s what it means to truly love someone. I too will be working on fine tuning my sixth sense because I think it’s necessary and it will be fun.
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Comfort Within! 5 years 3 months ago #3651

  • Jess
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First, I want to say Mason, you missed your calling my lady. That was so beautifully worded. So empathetic. Society is hard on all of us, we have to realize we can only do the best we can, sometimes the pressure of life is a heavy burden. Many people take their own lives, many people. Imagine having parents who insist on living they dreams through you. That’s even more pressure. This journey is often times a difficult one and all we can do is the best we can.

None verbal forms of communication. I knew Ben was dangerous and there is nothing my parents could do. He just had a thirst for causing discomfort, pain. I distanced myself from him as an adult and I was surprised to see him when he showed up and wanted to be a part of my life. I regret it because a woman lost her life and another came close but little Amber didn’t survive. I am finally coming to terms with what my brother did. I know I wasn’t blamed but I felt responsible. I blamed myself. I had to spend some time with Rod. I struggled. I have a good wife that noticed I was struggling before I even realized it myself. Yes…we need to know our companions and I’m glad this time I am with the right woman. We have young children like Mason, but my wife needed to have them. She needs to be able to raise children in a normal home. She’s doing great.

Karen, it’s all right to be happy to be free. It’s all right. I want to get my sixth sense perfected as well, I’m on my way. I’m also back on speaking terms with my daughter, so far, so good.
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